This is a new series I’m launching. Check it out below, and stay tuned for more updates!
DP—
I turned 13 and then it all went to shit. Do I deserve some of the blame for that? Sure. But that doesn’t make me any less imprisoned.
It’s true what they say: Weed really is the gateway drug. You smoke one joint and then suddenly you’re huffing cold air through the chainlink fence of the prisonyard just trying to feel something.
My experience isn’t universal? Tough shit, cupcake. This isn’t about you.
It’s about him. Whoever he is.
Look, I don’t want to get off on the wrong foot here, I’m paying three packs to get this to you, so lemme start again.
I need your help. I need you to find out who he is and then tell me. You don’t have to do anything past that. I’ll take it from there. I just need you to find out who he is.
He was the man behind the art heists of ’98 and ’99. You know the ones. You’ve got to. All the newshounds sunk their teeth into it and barely left a second of airtime for weather or the goddamn traffic report. That’s the guy I’m talking about. Stole some pottery. A few statues. Some Monay’s or Picasso’s or Pollick’s or whatever. I don’t know.
Truth is, I wasn’t paying much attention at my trial. I don’t know the details, and it doesn’t matter anyway. I’m giving you plenty to go on, here. And I’ll even do better. Names. I’ve got four names for you, and he’s got to be one of them. They’re the only ones I bragged to about the heists, and he must’ve saw his chance to get away with it by framing me.
But listen, you can’t tell anyone. It’s gotta be our secret. I’ve got a reputation to protect.
You seem like someone who’d understand that.
Don’t get the wrong idea or anything, I’m not asking you to clear my name. I’m here and the water pressure’s better than that other dump I was living in. And at least I don’t have to pretend to snort cocaine every five seconds anymore.
Point is, I just need you to identify him. I’ll take care of the rest. Do we have a deal?
— BW
Oh yeah! I almost forgot. The names. Jasper, Eric, Josh, and Dean. Find them.
Next Post: Penned #2
Miles Away 